IELTS Writing Task 1
The first graph below shows the weight (in tonnes) of fruit produced by a farm during each month in 2013, and also the amount (in tonnes) of fertiliser used.
The second graph shows the volume of rainfall in each month (in millimetres.)
Viktoriia Victory’s comments
This essay would receive Band 9 in IELTS. The candidate gives a brief paraphrase of the Task introduction, and then deals with each chart in turn. He correctly identifies the trend in chart 1 (fruit increases as fertiliser decreases) and uses a small selection of figures to describe this, making it clear that he sees the trend (“this seasonal pattern is largely reversed. . .”) He makes it clear that he understands this is a ‘movement’ type Task by using the past simple to describe the changes, but he does not simply ‘list’ the sequence of figures in order.
He identifies the second trend (fertiliser use follows rainfall levels) and selects key figures to demonstrate this. The summary reinforces the trend among the 3 elements (fruit, fertiliser and rainfall.) He correctly makes no attempt to explain or give reasons for the trends.
Paragraphs are organised to follow the charts. The language used is clear and neutral, with no emotion or personal tone. The simple past is rightly used, because the year is shown (2013.) He makes it clear which charts he is discussing (“We can see . . . looking at . . . regarding”) and uses a variety of vocabulary to describe movements (decline/rise/dip/fall etc.) He uses marked/slightly/steadily/rapidly etc to show that he understands the rate of the changes. He uses phrases such as reversed and by contrast to emphasise the comparison of the patterns.
The impression is of a candidate who has analysed the trends and selected key data to show that he understands them, without excessive detail.